Views on Sexual Intimacy

This past week I have read some great articles written on sexual intimacy and where it fits within a marriage.  I have been in a loving marital relationship for over 21 years and am so grateful for the insights that I have gained over these past years.  I viewed sexual intimacy as a 21 year old newlywed very differently to how I view it now.  It is more sacred and powerful than I could have ever imagined!

A great article on intimacy was written by Sean Brotherson and entitled, “Fulfilling the Sexual Stewardship in Marriage”.  In it he tells of a conversation that he had with his mother and aunt about sexual intimacy in marriage.  He had been reading a book and had lots of questions, one that he asked was, “what that experience (sexual intimacy) was really supposed to be like.”  He said his mother laughed and then said, “. . .sometimes it was fun, sometimes it was comforting, sometimes it was romantic, sometimes it was spiritual, and sometimes it was just a willingness to love.”  Brotherson said that, “that’s about the best answer he has ever heard on that question.” 

I too, love that answer!  

Intimacy in marriage can be multi-faceted and serve many purposes.  I would also add that when a husband and wife come together unselfishly, that it strengthens their eternal bond.  Elder Richard G. Scott says, “Within the enduring covenant of marriage, the Lord permits husband and wife the expression of the sacred procreative powers in all their loveliness and beauty within the bounds He has set.   One purpose of this private, sacred, intimate experience is to provide the physical bodies for the spirits Father in Heaven wants to experience mortality.  Another reason for these powerful and beautiful feelings of love is to bind husband and wife together in loyalty, fidelity, considerations of each other, and common purpose.” 

Victor Cline, in his book “How to Make a Good Marriage Great” defines perfectly what intimacy is all about.  He says, “In summary, sex should be a celebration.  It comes from God.  He created our sexual appetites and natures.  He has ordained us to make love both physically and spiritually.  He is pleased when He sees us bonded together sexually, in love, for this is the plan of creation.  And this plan permits the husband and wife to jointly participate in creating new life and, in a sense, perpetuate part of themselves into eternity through their children.  The sexual embrace should never be a chore or a duty, but a loving part of a larger relationship.  Of giving to our partner, cherishing, respecting, protecting each other.  It won’t always be easy.  But the rewards can be incredibly great if we choose to make them so.”